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So I have no pictures of any boats. This is from a tarot card I have. Yeah, I kinda believe in tarot cards.

Float in Your Boat

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Not sure what to write about.  Hopeless Tomatoes has risen to one of my all time favorite things I’ve ever written so kinda hard to top that.


I could write about the Ester Hicks quotes I’ve been reading lately about vibrations and energy.  Yeah, deep, existential shit but I’m deep and existential I guess.  I had a good conversation with a co-worker about that kinda stuff on Sunday.  I have nothing else at the moment so maybe I should expand on that.  

 

So somehow in my random GTS’ing (Google That Shit for those who don’t know) I found Ester Hicks who has some pretty powerful things to say about the Universe and energy and how our own energy or vibrations affect our life. 


She’s big about the “Law of Attraction” aka you get what you give.  Negativity and bad energy cause a low vibration and when you put that out, well, that’s what you get back. 


If you feel happiness, gratitude and positive energy then you raise your vibration, and those wonderful things more easily flow back to you.


Appreciation is key to raising your vibration. 


I appreciate today, June 1, 2022.  A day off of work thank fucking god, sitting on my porch in the sunshine, chores all done.  It’s a beautiful day. 


I’m thankful for the path my life has taken.  Yeah, sometimes I think about if things were different.  If my life had gone down the path of married (well, staying married), kids, white picket fences, you know,  “normalcy”. 


But that’s a passing thought. 


This non-normalcy is exactly where I’m suppose to be.  This is my path and nothing is amiss. 


I also never say never so who knows, white picket fence shopping could be in my future someday. 


So while I may think about what if life were different, I don’t lament what I don’t have–even a significant other at the moment, someone special to give my love to. 


But that’s okay too. Even with good vibrations the Universe has its own diving timing in giving you what you want.  I don’t regret the “normal” life I could have had because I’m suppose to have this one, for whatever reason. 


And the more I started appreciating that, the happier I started to become.  

 

As I’m writing this my mom just texted me that her cousin passed away, she was 75.  Youngish in today’s world.  But not if you don’t take care of yourself. 


My mom’s cousin didn’t take care of herself.  She let trauma grip her early on in her life and she never recovered.  She shotgun wedding’d it in her 20s and her husband cheated on her right after she had the baby.  The fucking day she brought the baby home she walked in on him with someone else.  WTF? 


That’s some super tough shit to deal with.  She let it bog her down her whole life, and I think her health suffered because of it. 


But she didn’t leave this life without teaching us all a lesson. 


Bad people will do bad things to you.  Even not bad people will do bad things to you. 


Bad shit happens.  It’s how you deal with it that matters. 

 

I don’t think she ever heard the saying “happiness is the best revenge”.  Happiness is hard to find right after something traumatic or heartbreaking happens.  But eventually you gotta pick yourself up because really, what’s the alternative?  A life of drudgery that’s what. 


But how do you do that exactly?  How do you cultivate happiness in the wake of soul-crushing defeat? 


It’s all about your mindset. 


It’s hard to change but you CAN do it.  Even if it feels weird and you have to lie to yourself in the beginning.  With practice, good thoughts become good feelings and you’ll begin to truly believe in happiness.  It’s all about positivity even where you initially can’t see any. 

 

I first started trying this strategy back in January which I wrote about in Positively Affirmed.  It worked as I said, but then I faltered.  Hey, we’re only human. 


Even when things seem to be going well, sometimes the path you’re on takes a left turn.  Life, jobs, health, relationships, yeah sometimes they just don’t go the way you were expecting or wanting, and it always seems like you never see that left turn coming up ahead.  Sharp turns like that have a nasty way of sneaking up on you with no warning, like street signs covered with overgrown trees. 


But that’s okay.  Not all surprise turns are bad, some are even exciting.  The turn is meant to be there and you’re meant to learn how to navigate it.  My poor cousin I’m afraid needed more navigation skills. 


Don’t we all from time to time.

 

I’m not sure where or how I stumbled upon Ester Hicks and this whole vibration thing.  I could say it was an accident while I was GTS’ing other stuff.  But was it really an accident? 


The Universe put it there for me.  Sometimes that happens, the Universe puts things meant for you right in front of your face. It’s your choice what you will do with it. 


“Raise your hopeful voice, you have a choice”.  Sorry, that’s a line from a song that just popped into my head.  It’s “Falling Slowly” by Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova.  I call it The Boat Song. 


Oh you’ve never heard of it?  Probably not as an Irish friend of mine says that only 7 people in America have heard of it. Eight people now as I recently told a friend about it.  Now you know too!  It’s too good to keep a secret.  


Another line of that song reminds me of my cousin (and a couple other people):  “you have suffered enough, and warred with yourself, it’s time that you won”. 


You win if you choose your own happiness. 


My mom’s cousin did not.  I feel bad for her and what her life could have been. I feel sad thinking of all the time she wasted letting one dickhead’s actions ruin her.  

 

I stumbled on a Jim Carrey video the other day. Yeah, that Jim Carrey.  He talks about manifestations and the power of willingness.  He said, “so many of us choose our path out of fear disguised as practicality.  What we really want seems impossibly out of reach and ridiculous to expect, so we never dare to ask the Universe for it.”


You’re allowed to want what you want. 


Before he was super famous he said he wrote himself a check for $10 million and put it in his pocket.  A year later he got the role in Dumb and Dumber for a payout of, you guessed it, $10 million. 


He put out that positive energy and willed what he wanted and the Universe responded in kind.  Like attracts like.  Crazy I know, but is it really that crazy? 


I guess my mom’s cousin never dared to ask the Universe for peace of mind, a happy life.  She let her trauma cripple her which turned into fear–fear of people, fear of trust, fear of living life any other way then what she had become accustomed to.  I feel so sad for her. 


You really do have to choose your own happiness first. You can’t make anyone else happy otherwise. 

 

I was that way years ago–defeated, hopeless, unhappy.  I changed though and was doing well but started faltering a bit a few months ago, aka I got squonky.  We all have our moments. 


But even in the down times, you eventually have to pick yourself up and know that if you embrace happiness, light and love, you will receive it in return even more so than you ever expected or imagined. Appreciate the now, but be eager for what the Universe has in store for you.  It will be awesome if you are open to letting it in. 


Do you appreciate the now?  What is good in your life at this very moment, this very second in time?  Don’t worry about the future, worrying puts out bad energy.  Everything will unfold as it’s meant to be.  You can’t mess it up.  

 

So as they say in yoga, be present, go with the flow, appreciate the now, and know that the Universe is bringing good things to you in its own special timing. 


And don’t try to fight against your path with negativity or fear or worry.  Paddling upstream is hard and resistance creates a low vibration.  Even the rough waters are meant to be navigated so you can come out to peace and stillness on the other side.  You also shouldn’t just jump out of your boat and walk along the shoreline to avoid them.  You just make the trip harder.  Who wants to trudge along carrying that heavy boat anyway? 


I did that one time, literally.  I was paddle boarding in Colorado.  It was so freakin windy and I was paddling and paddling and paddling and going nowhere.  I did finally get to the shore on the other side and thought I’ll never make it back so I’ll just get out and carry this paddle board around the lake.  Good idea right? 


Wrong.  That thing was fucking heavy as shit. 


So back in the water I went and just laid down on the board and paddled with my arms the whole way across. Quite the metaphor in there.  Just goes to show you that the Universe always shows you the way so don’t avoid it, paddle through it. 


So I will just let the current take me where it will with no worry and no expectations.  I’ll just happily float along while singing the boat song in my head and enjoying the ride.  

 

One of these days soon I’ll write about something a little more surface and light.  But this is my mood these days–deep, emotional, contemplative, but all in a good way.  All positive.


This is where I’m at right now, right where I’m suppose to be. 


We’ll see what turns the Universe has in store for me. 


Are you ready for what the Universe has in store for you? 

 

And as I’m sitting here on my porch on this beautiful sunny day, I just got a wave from my friendly neighborhood Wawa girl driving by in her car.  Today is a good day.   

 

“Don’t worry about the future, sooner or later it’s the past” – Meatloaf.  

 

 ❤

CM


6/1/22