It’s not actually Valentine’s Day yet, today is February 13th, Galentine’s Day, a day to hang out with your gals, pals, friends, hell even your pets. Pets are friends people. Whoever you’re hanging with today, be it girls, guys, dogs, cats, houseplants, enjoy your time with your homies.
But what if the only person you have to hang out with is yourself?
Some people can’t even comprehend that, but being totally, completely, utterly alone is a thing. No friends, no family, no pets, not even a geranium.
Nothing.
That’s sad, like makes me want to cry right now thinking about it sad.
We’ve all felt alone, lonely, like we have “no one” even though we have people in our life. We kinda just say that.
But there are people who literally have no one–no one to talk to, to laugh with, cry with, no one to rely on.
And you can’t assume because they have no one that they must be a giant asshole, though that of course can be the case.
Whatever the reason, there are people out there who are totally alone.
I think made-up holidays like Valentine’s Day just throw this shit in people’s faces. What if you have no one to buy a mass-produced, cheesy greeting card for? So what, now you’re supposed to feel like shit for that?
Fuck that.
Truly alone people have enough to deal with.
Consider yourself lucky if you’re not one of them.
Loneliness is
Having good news
And no one to tell
Most of us have someone–at least one relative near or far, at least one co-worker we’re kinda friendly with or at least one friend or sort-of friend. Maybe the one you have isn’t even human. Loyal pets and trusty houseplants count.
But at least there is a sole being out there that knows you exist, at least mildly cares about your existence, or at least appreciates you tending to their own existence. Don’t forget to feed the dog and water the ficus.
But then there are those of us who are surrounded by loved ones and liked ones, yet we often still feel alone.
Maybe we don’t let people in enough. Maybe we don’t let our real selves out enough. Keeping people at an arm’s distance feels normal. That is until this bullshit holiday comes around to remind us of just how mentally fucked up we are.
And what if you have a lot of someones but don’t have a “the one”, either by choice or by the Universe’s choice? Then this day of love becomes just straight-up vomit worthy.
Hey I’m no Bitter Betty, I’m happy to be single. Yeah, yeah, every single person says that. But do they mean it? I do. I only speak the truth.
I see so many married, locked down people who are fucking miserable. I used to be one of those people.
Hey, if you’re married or locked down and happier than a pig in shit, more power to you. But I see more people than you’d think that are on the other side of happy. And they stay on the other side for years, decades, a lifetime even.
Gluttons for punishment they are.
I would think Valentine’s Day for these people is a chore. Gotta keep up appearances so “here my love, I bought you this awesome gift, a new…lint remover!” No joke, I actually got a lint remover as a gift one time. I was definitely amazed and not in the good way.
I’m no diva, but a lint remover, really? I’d rather have nothing. And I did get nothing one year, well, for many years. The nothing was better. Better than faking it.
I hate fake shit. Be real and get me nothing over what you think you’re supposed to do like buy a gift.
So yeah, I’ll take being single over fake shit all day.
But hey, you wanna throw say, a Whitman’s Sampler my way every now and then, I won’t say no. Philly-made vanilla buttercream all day! Whitman’s started in Philly people.
Alone is great, I can do what I want, when I want, with whoever I want. Assuming I have any whoevers.
Lonely is different–you have no whoevers whatsoever.
That shit sucks.
But hey, if John Cusack, John Legend or Joseph Gordon-Levitt wanna come by and take away my beloved single status, I’m always willing to make an exception.
But until the Universe decides that it’s time for me to encounter my next “the one”, I’ll happily wait alone on my couch with my whoevers–my plants and my temporary roommate, my friend’s cat Felix.
Felix gives zero fucks about Valentine’s Day, or most other days for that matter. He lives his best life. Extra treats provided by me don’t hurt.
So if you’re super psyched about Valentine’s Day aka you’re a new couple, or if you’re like a guy I waited on tonight whose birthday happens to be on Valentine’s Day, then go ahead and gush to your heart’s content.
But if you hate this day with the burning intensity of a thousand fiery suns and you want to tell Valentine’s Day to go suck it, remember that it’s just another day. Another day to be thankful that you are at least still here.
And save a vanilla buttercream for me.
❤️
CM
2/13/24
